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Negotiation Skills

Two Ways of Approaching Negotiation

1. The Contest View of Negotiation: Two (or more) parties going head-to-head with the aim being to emerge the winner at the expense of the others (the ‘losers’). If this approach does result in an agreement, more often than not it will be difficult to enforce because one party (the ‘losers’) will have a different attitude to the others (the ‘winners’).

2. The Co-operative View of Negotiation: Two or more parties jointly seeking an outcome that will be beneficial to all involved in the negotiation. This results in an agreement that all sides want to work.

Remember: First seek out your points in common – and the most obvious ‘common point’ is that you all want to reach an agreement. Failure to negotiate an agreement will be a failure for all sides.Your success is not determined by your ability to beat the other side – but to work with them to identify a mutually beneficial agreement. If the opposition falls into a contest mentality, it is helpful to remind them that you are both there for the same purpose.

Four Essential Communication Skills for Successful Negotiation

1. Listening Skills
Listening to the other party is important, but extremely difficult – because you are so busy trying to identify what you can say next to ‘trip them up’, ‘back them into a corner or score a point to give you the advantage. If you’re focus in listening is this, then all you will hear is the inconsistencies and the loopholes in what they say – and you will probably miss the content that holds the key to a mutually beneficial outcome.

2. Empathy
If you can’t put yourself in the other party’s shoes and see the situation from their perspective, reaching a successful negotiated agreement will be almost impossible. If they think differently to you, don’t try to bring their way of thinking around to your way. Instead recognise that this is part of the problem. Conflict is not just the gap between two opposing objectives; it is the difference between two ways of looking at a situation.Understanding is not agreeing.Show that you understand what they have said or they won’t value your response to it. “Showing that you understand is the cheapest concession you can make.” Fisher & Ury (Getting to Yes)

3. Awareness of Context (in which they are speaking)
What they say might be more for the benefit of others (on their own side) than for you. Be aware of who else is listening. Face-saving is important. “Successful negotiation relies on giving both parties a dignified exit.” Terry Waite Past dealings between the parties might also affect their attitude or offers, so it is good to have someone on your team who is aware of the history.

4. Awareness of Emotions
“Let’s not get all emotional over this” is a common phrase heard in negotiation; yet emotions are crucially important. Negotiation is not just an exercise in logic. The emotions of all parties (as illogical and unjustified as they may be) are just as important and need to be addressed equally with their arguments.

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